So I had a moment last night…

The moment we all know and hate, that one when every dark and self-deprecating feeling you’ve ever buried comes rising up like a tidal wave and paralyses you with pain. All of a sudden, everything that is going right for you vanishes and it feels like all life wants to do is hurt you. Even facts that you know are completely unquestionable become twisted in your brain’s determination to reduce you to a blubbering wreck.

These are the times when you need people. It may be a friendly word or a cup of tea, or just a hug while you let it all out. This is why, even when you are lost in the pain, you must not push everyone away; they are the ones who can look into your feelings and go “hang on, this isn’t true and you know it” and help you come back into yourself. It’s the most valuable thing anyone can do for you in that moment, and the most valuable thing you can do for anyone else who is stuck in that moment.

It’s a bad habit of myself, personally, to try and hide the dark feelings from the people around me, and I bet most other people do it too. As people in a modern society we’re encouraged to not rely on anyone for anything, when in fact trusting and relying on people is the way to get the best out of ourselves.

Don’t be afraid to tell people that you’re Not OK, because chances are they will want to help you through it, and they will probably need you to help them through something similar at some point. If you don’t have anyone physically there then reach out via phone and social media. Even complete strangers can be exactly what you need!

If you ever do need to reach out, feel free to message me on any of the following social media platforms (the Facebook page isn’t completely developed yet but it’s there if you want to contact me!) :

Twitter: @yoginiwishes

Instagram: @yoginiwishes

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Yoginiwishes/

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Be Brave – The Lesson I’ve Learned

It’s been 2 months since I begun documenting my wellbeing journey, and probably past time I did a little personal review!

When I begun this journey I weighed 10st 7lbs, had had 3 emotional breakdowns in 4 months, and my Tourettes was ridiculously active due to my stress and anxiety levels. I decided enough was enough. My priority became getting myself out of that stressful situation so that I could concentrate on healing my body and spirit – I pushed like crazy and got my own little rented house on a quiet estate not far from work, I allowed myself to depend on others (such as my boyfriend Nick and best friend from work Emma, not to mention the wonderful support from my family and friends around my parents’ end) and gave up trying to hide my struggles. I stood up and faced my difficulties head on, and it’s probably the best decision I ever made.

2 months on, I’m doing so much better. My finances are stable despite the extra monthly outgoings, my house is coming together really well (other than the poor garden, but that needs extra love!), although I’m not as vigilant as I should be with home practise I ensure to attend a yoga class at the local gym every week, I’m emotionally a lot more stable, my Tourettes symptoms have almost disappeared because my stress levels have fallen so much, I don’t stress out anywhere near as easily as I used to, I’m sleeping a lot better, and in myself I can feel that I’m on the path to physical, mental, and spiritual wellbeing. I feel healthier and more grounded, and have a much more positive outlook on situations. I’m nearly always smiling – apparently a smile suits me!

It was scary, giving up what I knew to move out on my own. It was hard, getting the motivation together to fight the good fight. It was worth it, because not only can I tell that I’m in a much better place but so can everyone around me.

If you’re struggling with personal situations or mental health, take a minute to take stock. How do you feel? Can you feel the pressures of what’s going on dragging you down as a person? Can you recognise your body giving up because you’ve lost the will to fight?

If your answer to these questions is yes, then you have two options. 1) give up. Stop trying. Let yourself fail. Or 2) stand up. Try harder. Have the courage and the strength to push forwards and become the person you know you deserve to be. The journey will be hard, and at times some obstacles will seem insurmountable. But allow yourself to flow like the water. It takes effort but you can find a way around every roadblock you come across. Sometimes, we have to open ourselves to what we thought was impossible; sometimes we just have to learn to share the load.

If you need a little bit of help getting your journey started, reach out to others who’ve made their own. It may be me, it may be a friend or member of the family, or it may be a complete stranger. The hardest part is recognising that you need the help, admitting it to both yourself and others, and then actually going and finding the help. Be brave, and be honest with yourself; you may find potential within yourself that you never knew existed.

Namaste 🙂 x

 

Featured image with credit to Clic Par Hasard, Tumblr