So I had a moment last night…

The moment we all know and hate, that one when every dark and self-deprecating feeling you’ve ever buried comes rising up like a tidal wave and paralyses you with pain. All of a sudden, everything that is going right for you vanishes and it feels like all life wants to do is hurt you. Even facts that you know are completely unquestionable become twisted in your brain’s determination to reduce you to a blubbering wreck.

These are the times when you need people. It may be a friendly word or a cup of tea, or just a hug while you let it all out. This is why, even when you are lost in the pain, you must not push everyone away; they are the ones who can look into your feelings and go “hang on, this isn’t true and you know it” and help you come back into yourself. It’s the most valuable thing anyone can do for you in that moment, and the most valuable thing you can do for anyone else who is stuck in that moment.

It’s a bad habit of myself, personally, to try and hide the dark feelings from the people around me, and I bet most other people do it too. As people in a modern society we’re encouraged to not rely on anyone for anything, when in fact trusting and relying on people is the way to get the best out of ourselves.

Don’t be afraid to tell people that you’re Not OK, because chances are they will want to help you through it, and they will probably need you to help them through something similar at some point. If you don’t have anyone physically there then reach out via phone and social media. Even complete strangers can be exactly what you need!

If you ever do need to reach out, feel free to message me on any of the following social media platforms (the Facebook page isn’t completely developed yet but it’s there if you want to contact me!) :

Twitter: @yoginiwishes

Instagram: @yoginiwishes

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Yoginiwishes/

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Anxiety

At some point almost everyone will suffer some form of anxiety. In the high-stress society we live in it’s almost inevitable that eventually you will get overwhelmed, whether by a culmination of little things or one huge life screw-up. What determines how we cope is what we choose to do to handle it. Some people choose to take the medicated route, and if it works for them then great, but some people don’t want to rely on medicine to fix the problem and would rather do it themselves. 

For those people, I have a few hints:

  • Speak to someone. It could be a close friend, old acquaintance, anxiety helpline or a random stranger from the Web. Talking through your issues will help you rationalise them, realise how you got to where you are and probably how to get back to where you want to be
  • If you don’t want to speak to a person, speak to a pet or a plant (I prefer aloe Vera because I kill most other plants). Just the act of talking it out will help you make sense of what’s going on
  • Make use of your garden. Certain herbs have excellent anti-anxiety effects; try drying some lavender and putting it into a small sachet to keep with you – the smell can really help bring you back to earth in an unpleasant moment. Another favorite of mine is a perky cup of tea, such as matcha with lemon balm and garden mint. Cinnamon and ginger are also excellently scented and flavoured – they’re brilliant for bringing your thoughts back under control and grounding yourself
  • Avoid high levels of caffeine and sugar. They give you a semi-unnatural high and you’ll end up feeling worse once you crash, not to mention the other adverse effects they have on your health. Both are fine in moderation, but you might want to skip the Coke every now and then
  • Keep a plant in your bedroom and your window open. Plants turn carbon dioxide into oxygen, purifying the air in the room, and keeping the window open lets the fresh air circulate; this extra oxygen can give you a boost of energy and positivity all day long
  • Get some sleep! The more run down and tired you are, the worse you’ll feel. Cut out all caffeine after 4pm, and put the phone, TV, tablet, games etc away at least an hour before bed. Try to keep your room nice and cool, and as a place for quiet time only. If your TV is in your room find a cloth to throw over it or turn it around at night; it’ll help your brain recognise that this is now a sleeping space. Maybe get a lavender pillow spray, the smell is amazing. Also, if you have an eye mask, pop it in the fridge for a bit before bed so it’s nice and cold – it’ll soothe the irritation in your eyes caused by tech, tiredness etc
  • Do some yin yoga. This style focuses on being kind to the body, giving yourself a bit of love, restoring,  and calming you rather than a more intense normal session; there are plenty of tutorials on youtube, don’t worry! 
  • Try meditation. It isn’t for everyone, but if you can find what works it  can really help you calm down and face your anxiety without getting stressed out. I like to put shamanic drumming chants or binaural music on while I meditate because silence is the most distracting thing ever for me
  • Create your safe place. For those familiar with the TV show Sherlock, the safe place is like a mind palace for happy memories, hopeful thoughts, and inner peace. Your safe place could be anywhere, from a desert island to a luxury hotel to an underground cave filled with beautiful plants. It’s somewhere you can hide your mind from the damaging thoughts and tackle them as and when you can. I like to visit my safe place before bed so I can tackle any stresses from the day before trying to sleep
  • Do something you enjoy. Whether alone or work a friend, get out of the house and do something. It can be as small as sitting in the sun and reading a book, or as big as going rock climbing with a group of friends. Just find something to do that makes you happy

    These are just a few hints for natural anxiety management. For those taking the medicated route, you might find that incorporating some of these techniques into your daily routine along with your tablets gives you an extra boost. I’d love to hear other people’s suggestions, or feedback if you’ve tried any of these! 

    We will fight anxiety, and we will fight it together. 

    Walk in beauty, 

    Namaste x

    Be Brave – The Lesson I’ve Learned

    It’s been 2 months since I begun documenting my wellbeing journey, and probably past time I did a little personal review!

    When I begun this journey I weighed 10st 7lbs, had had 3 emotional breakdowns in 4 months, and my Tourettes was ridiculously active due to my stress and anxiety levels. I decided enough was enough. My priority became getting myself out of that stressful situation so that I could concentrate on healing my body and spirit – I pushed like crazy and got my own little rented house on a quiet estate not far from work, I allowed myself to depend on others (such as my boyfriend Nick and best friend from work Emma, not to mention the wonderful support from my family and friends around my parents’ end) and gave up trying to hide my struggles. I stood up and faced my difficulties head on, and it’s probably the best decision I ever made.

    2 months on, I’m doing so much better. My finances are stable despite the extra monthly outgoings, my house is coming together really well (other than the poor garden, but that needs extra love!), although I’m not as vigilant as I should be with home practise I ensure to attend a yoga class at the local gym every week, I’m emotionally a lot more stable, my Tourettes symptoms have almost disappeared because my stress levels have fallen so much, I don’t stress out anywhere near as easily as I used to, I’m sleeping a lot better, and in myself I can feel that I’m on the path to physical, mental, and spiritual wellbeing. I feel healthier and more grounded, and have a much more positive outlook on situations. I’m nearly always smiling – apparently a smile suits me!

    It was scary, giving up what I knew to move out on my own. It was hard, getting the motivation together to fight the good fight. It was worth it, because not only can I tell that I’m in a much better place but so can everyone around me.

    If you’re struggling with personal situations or mental health, take a minute to take stock. How do you feel? Can you feel the pressures of what’s going on dragging you down as a person? Can you recognise your body giving up because you’ve lost the will to fight?

    If your answer to these questions is yes, then you have two options. 1) give up. Stop trying. Let yourself fail. Or 2) stand up. Try harder. Have the courage and the strength to push forwards and become the person you know you deserve to be. The journey will be hard, and at times some obstacles will seem insurmountable. But allow yourself to flow like the water. It takes effort but you can find a way around every roadblock you come across. Sometimes, we have to open ourselves to what we thought was impossible; sometimes we just have to learn to share the load.

    If you need a little bit of help getting your journey started, reach out to others who’ve made their own. It may be me, it may be a friend or member of the family, or it may be a complete stranger. The hardest part is recognising that you need the help, admitting it to both yourself and others, and then actually going and finding the help. Be brave, and be honest with yourself; you may find potential within yourself that you never knew existed.

    Namaste 🙂 x

     

    Featured image with credit to Clic Par Hasard, Tumblr