So I had a moment last night…

The moment we all know and hate, that one when every dark and self-deprecating feeling you’ve ever buried comes rising up like a tidal wave and paralyses you with pain. All of a sudden, everything that is going right for you vanishes and it feels like all life wants to do is hurt you. Even facts that you know are completely unquestionable become twisted in your brain’s determination to reduce you to a blubbering wreck.

These are the times when you need people. It may be a friendly word or a cup of tea, or just a hug while you let it all out. This is why, even when you are lost in the pain, you must not push everyone away; they are the ones who can look into your feelings and go “hang on, this isn’t true and you know it” and help you come back into yourself. It’s the most valuable thing anyone can do for you in that moment, and the most valuable thing you can do for anyone else who is stuck in that moment.

It’s a bad habit of myself, personally, to try and hide the dark feelings from the people around me, and I bet most other people do it too. As people in a modern society we’re encouraged to not rely on anyone for anything, when in fact trusting and relying on people is the way to get the best out of ourselves.

Don’t be afraid to tell people that you’re Not OK, because chances are they will want to help you through it, and they will probably need you to help them through something similar at some point. If you don’t have anyone physically there then reach out via phone and social media. Even complete strangers can be exactly what you need!

If you ever do need to reach out, feel free to message me on any of the following social media platforms (the Facebook page isn’t completely developed yet but it’s there if you want to contact me!) :

Twitter: @yoginiwishes

Instagram: @yoginiwishes

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Yoginiwishes/

Advertisements

Sometimes You Need To Know When To Call It Quits…Β 

… And just take the time to look after yourself. The other day, I learned that lesson very well. 

I’ve been on some new medication for the past month or so that has really screwed with my hormone levels: it’s exhausting trying to maintain a normal attitude at work when inside I want to simultaneously laugh, cry, and curl up in a ball to sleep. I’ve done pretty well so far but it’s both mentally and emotionally taxing, but I refused to let it have its way because it would impact my ability to work. That was mistake number one. 

Mistake number two was letting myself get dragged into worries right before bed. Money, family, work etc so normal worries, but when paired with my anxiety they set off a chain of nightmares all the way through the night. I stayed asleep but it was definitely not a quality sleep. 

Mistake number three was trying to go to work the next day. Bear in mind that I overslept by 2 hours, which has never happened before. I should have paid attention to my body and mind and called in sick for my own sake as well as that of everyone who would have had to deal with me. 

I knew I was in a fragile place, but thought I could power through like I have been doing and went in to work anyway despite being an hour late (thankfully it’s just a 10 minute drive down the road nowadays). Walked in and said hello to the receptionist as always, intending to work my day as normal. I have a reputation at work for always being there at the same time, so understandably she asked if I was OK. 

That was it. That was all it took for me to burst into tears and realise that I’d run myself into the ground trying to fight my own body and mind. A few minutes later, after talking to my boss (and I think I scared him by bursting into tears again), I was on my way home. 

A day of rest and I’m almost back to normal. I barely left my bed for that day from sheer exhaustion. My moods and emotions are still back and forth like a pendulum but now when I feel myself dropping into a negative I pop to the loo, have a cry if I need to, and just take a few minutes to deal with the swing and get back to normal. 

Sometimes you have to know when to call it quits, it just took me a mini breakdown to realise it. 

It’s better to take a couple minutes here and there to check in with yourself than run yourself into the ground trying to pretend everything is OK. 

Look after yourself, you’re more important than your job/project or what people think of you. 

Walk in beauty, 

Namaste x

Anxiety

At some point almost everyone will suffer some form of anxiety. In the high-stress society we live in it’s almost inevitable that eventually you will get overwhelmed, whether by a culmination of little things or one huge life screw-up. What determines how we cope is what we choose to do to handle it. Some people choose to take the medicated route, and if it works for them then great, but some people don’t want to rely on medicine to fix the problem and would rather do it themselves. 

For those people, I have a few hints:

  • Speak to someone. It could be a close friend, old acquaintance, anxiety helpline or a random stranger from the Web. Talking through your issues will help you rationalise them, realise how you got to where you are and probably how to get back to where you want to be
  • If you don’t want to speak to a person, speak to a pet or a plant (I prefer aloe Vera because I kill most other plants). Just the act of talking it out will help you make sense of what’s going on
  • Make use of your garden. Certain herbs have excellent anti-anxiety effects; try drying some lavender and putting it into a small sachet to keep with you – the smell can really help bring you back to earth in an unpleasant moment. Another favorite of mine is a perky cup of tea, such as matcha with lemon balm and garden mint. Cinnamon and ginger are also excellently scented and flavoured – they’re brilliant for bringing your thoughts back under control and grounding yourself
  • Avoid high levels of caffeine and sugar. They give you a semi-unnatural high and you’ll end up feeling worse once you crash, not to mention the other adverse effects they have on your health. Both are fine in moderation, but you might want to skip the Coke every now and then
  • Keep a plant in your bedroom and your window open. Plants turn carbon dioxide into oxygen, purifying the air in the room, and keeping the window open lets the fresh air circulate; this extra oxygen can give you a boost of energy and positivity all day long
  • Get some sleep! The more run down and tired you are, the worse you’ll feel. Cut out all caffeine after 4pm, and put the phone, TV, tablet, games etc away at least an hour before bed. Try to keep your room nice and cool, and as a place for quiet time only. If your TV is in your room find a cloth to throw over it or turn it around at night; it’ll help your brain recognise that this is now a sleeping space. Maybe get a lavender pillow spray, the smell is amazing. Also, if you have an eye mask, pop it in the fridge for a bit before bed so it’s nice and cold – it’ll soothe the irritation in your eyes caused by tech, tiredness etc
  • Do some yin yoga. This style focuses on being kind to the body, giving yourself a bit of love, restoring,  and calming you rather than a more intense normal session; there are plenty of tutorials on youtube, don’t worry! 
  • Try meditation. It isn’t for everyone, but if you can find what works it  can really help you calm down and face your anxiety without getting stressed out. I like to put shamanic drumming chants or binaural music on while I meditate because silence is the most distracting thing ever for me
  • Create your safe place. For those familiar with the TV show Sherlock, the safe place is like a mind palace for happy memories, hopeful thoughts, and inner peace. Your safe place could be anywhere, from a desert island to a luxury hotel to an underground cave filled with beautiful plants. It’s somewhere you can hide your mind from the damaging thoughts and tackle them as and when you can. I like to visit my safe place before bed so I can tackle any stresses from the day before trying to sleep
  • Do something you enjoy. Whether alone or work a friend, get out of the house and do something. It can be as small as sitting in the sun and reading a book, or as big as going rock climbing with a group of friends. Just find something to do that makes you happy

    These are just a few hints for natural anxiety management. For those taking the medicated route, you might find that incorporating some of these techniques into your daily routine along with your tablets gives you an extra boost. I’d love to hear other people’s suggestions, or feedback if you’ve tried any of these! 

    We will fight anxiety, and we will fight it together. 

    Walk in beauty, 

    Namaste x